Going Back To Basics

going back to basics jp

Okay i’m not talking about going back to basics to the extent of that picture above but more going back to basics in terms of getting sh*t done. As of just recently I have been getting busier and busier but I am getting lazier and lazier, needless to say this is not a good mix. So to combat this I am going to go back to the basic productivity activities that I used to do.

Firstly I am going to start writing sh*t down again and making lists, as I’ve discussed before writing stuff down with a notepad and pen is the best way of getting yourself to be more productive, seeing that goal written down in your own handwriting can have a big effect on you not to mention it is incredibly satisfying to tick something off your to-do list.

It also allows you to plan out your day when you write things down because you’re not constantly thinking “I’ve got so much to do, I’ve got to do this and that” you just write it down and get on with it, this also makes it easier to think clearly as you have a clear mind.

Secondly I am going to start going for walks and listening to podcasts while on my walk again, this really helps me to clear my head and gives me some time out to think as well as letting me get in a bit extra exercise. One thing a lot of successful people share is they have dedicated time for themselves and allow themselves some time to clear their head.

Finally I am going to spend less time on Instagram as this seems to be eating up all my free-time at the moment so I will be setting out certain times where I can check social media. On that note I am going to leave this one here, so I will leave you with this:

“Days are expensive. When you spend a day you have one less day to spend. So make sure you spend each one wisely.” – Jim Rohn

Thank you for reading this one, its a bit shorter than my normal post but that’s probably a good thing. Leave a like if you enjoyed it and I encourage any of you struggling with productivity to try out these tips as well. Hit follow if you would like to keep up to date with my blog as I post twice a week, thank you again and I shall see you on Tuesday. Ciao!

 

 

Thoughts Are Not Facts!

Thoughts are not facts jpeg.jpgIf there is one thing that I learnt when I was reading ‘Mind Power’ by James Borg, it was that thoughts are not facts, this is something he really nails into your head for pretty much a whole chapter and I can see why, because it is something people need to learn, just because you think something does not make it true.

This is one of the biggest causes of misery in our lives, just think how many times have you text someone and they didn’t reply and you got p*ssed off because you think that they are ignoring you but you know this might not be the case, they could be busy and not have access to their phone, they might have lost their phone, they might have had a family emergency, the list of reasons is endless but we jump to the conclusion that they’re ignoring us and get annoyed.

Or you have an embarrassing moment while you are at work and you go home panicking that your colleagues will bring it up tomorrow and you’ll be the laughing stock of office and you’ll never live it down and start worrying. When you get in the next day there is a good chance nobody will even remember it, if they do and they do say something it’ll probably just be a one-off comment.

Just because we think we know something or think a certain thing will happen does not mean it will, we base our thoughts on our past experiences and our mindset, it does not make it fact. This is something we need to spend time working on and give up believing everything we think is fact because it just creates unwarranted stress and anxiety, you are just torturing yourself over something that might not happen.

Trust me I know this feeling better than most, as someone who suffers/suffered from anxiety this is something I used to do A LOT! I would constantly worry about going out because I thought things would go wrong and I’d create movies in my head of it going terrribly, one thing would go wrong which would lead to something else happening which would lead to something else going wrong and so on.

Okay I need to end this one now because it’s getting long, thoughts are not facts, just because you think it doesn’t not make it true, remember this especially when you’re having those negative thoughts and you will be much less stressed and anxious. For now I will leave you with this:

“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral.”

I’m sorry this is a day late again, I might start uploading blogs on Tuesday and Saturday because it fits into my schedule a lot better. Thank you for reading this and I hope you find it useful, if you did leave a like and possibly a comment. I blog twice a week so hit the follow button if you want to keep up to date with my content. Thanks again and I will see you on Tuesday. Ciao!

What’s The Worst That Could Happen?

Whats the worst that could happen jpeg

Okay first off lets start by saying I’m not sponsored by Dr Pepper, I just love their tagline! But seriously what is the worst that could happen? This is something I find I am asking myself more and more just as of recently especially since I am trying to be more positive and happier. So if you have been following this blog for a while then you will know I have suffered from anxiety for many years and as of recently when I started being more positive it has massively improved.

This little question has been a big part of me lowering my anxiety and doing things that I wouldn’t normally do, and it is something I encourage all of you to try as well. If something scares you or makes you feel uncomfortable then do it, as they say feel the fear but do it anyway. I have learnt that doing the things that scare you is how you grow as a person and find out more about yourself, you grow from doing sh*t that scares you, sure you may be scared at the time but once it is done and you look back on it and think “I did that” there is a huge amount of self confidence that can be gained from it.

It is almost guaranteed that whatever that event or situation is, it will not be as scary once you are doing it, the build up to something is usually far worse than the actual event itself, even if the event is scary you will benefit from that afterwards, you will be well on your way to conquer that fear.

Because of this I now try to do things that scare me, things that may seem like small acts to others but are usually things that would terrify me. First I changed my look by getting a new hairstyle, first time in about 15 years I’ve had a different hairstyle so I was naturally abit nervous at first but I did it and I love my new look. Then I tried contact lenses, for anyone who knows me you will know I have a thing when it comes to eyes, I am very squeamish when it comes to eyes and I never thought I’d be able to wear contacts but I did it, I just thought “F*ck it” and went for it, now although I didn’t keep the contacts I am able to touch my eyes no problem whereas before I would have freaked out trying to do that.

I also recently posted my blog picture and linked my blog up with my Instagram account, I am naturally a very shy and quiet person, I NEVER post on social media as a general rule so to announce to all my friends and the rest of Instagram that I have a blog and they could check it out by following the link, that was huge for me and I kept doubting whether I should do it or not but then again I just went for it and I am so glad I did.

Okay I am rambling on again so I will bring this to a close, I am going to set you a task, this week I want you to do something you wouldn’t normally do. Something that scares you whether that is going on a roller coaster or on something that’s very tall if you are afraid of heights, or volunteering to do that speech at college/work. Anything that you wouldn’t normally do… just do it this time and once you have done it look back at it and just think “I did that” and give yourself a pat on the back. Trust me if you start doing this you will become much more self confident and you will grow from it. You will also open yourself up to new opportunities that you would otherwise have been too scared to do.

Before I rabbit on anymore I am going to leave you with this:

“Psychology says: Go with the choice that scares you the most, because that’s the one that’s going to help you grow.”

Thank you very much for reading this one, please have a go at my little challenge and let me know how you got on with it in the comments. Hit like if you enjoyed it and want to see more content like this, I post twice a week so follow me if you would like to be updated every time I post. Thanks again and as usual I will see you on Friday. Ciao!

The Art Of Not Giving A F*ck

art-of-not-giving-a-fuck-jpeg

The number one reason people don’t do things they want to do is because they care what other people think, this prevents them from reaching their goals, taking risks or living to their full potential because they are so terrified of being judged.

One thing that will benefit anybody reading this, is learning the subtle art of not giving a f*ck, if you learn this I guarantee your confidence will go through the roof, you will be much happier and you will achieve so much more than you would have achieved if you keep caring about what people think.

Truth is, in a persons mind they are the main character in their story, everyone else is just a side character, people do not care about what those side characters are doing anywhere near as much as people think.

It takes practice but stop caring what other people think. Let’s have an example of what i’m talking about, say you post a picture of yourself on Facebook, say you are showing a birth mark that you are incredibly self conscious about, if someone looks at that and says/thinks “Ew that’s ugly why would they post that” that says much more about them than it does about you, it shows you are confident enough to show off your flaws and your imperfections whereas that person who insulted you is secretly insecure about part of their own body image and doesn’t even have the confidence to show it off themselves so they decide to insult you to make themselves feel better.

Really who cares what people think, what does it matter what anyone says about you, if they compliment or admire you for whatever you are doing then groovy but if they try to insult you that just shows their own insecurities. When someone see’s something they are jealous of or they are insecure about they are inclined to get defensive and enter attack mode and insult you and try to put you down to make themselves feel better, don’t give them that satisfaction.

If you really want to do something then do it! Don’t let anyone stop you from following your dreams or posting that picture on social media or starting up that YouTube channel! F*ck what other people think. On that note I am going to leave you with this:

“What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life” – Deepak Chopra”

Sorry I didn’t post yesterday, I didn’t have the time to write a post that was good enough quality before I had to go to work. Thank you ever so much for reading this one and I encourage you to start making a conscious effort to care less about what other people think, what’s the worst that can happen? If you enjoyed this one please like it and maybe leave me a comment to give me your opinion. I post twice a week every week so feel free to follow me to keep up to date with my content, thanks again! I shall see you next Tuesday. Ciao!

It’s Okay To Say No!

If there is anything that I am terribly guilty of doing it is saying yes to everything, however this is something that I am trying to change this year. Truth is it is okay to say no! You are not obliged to do anything that you do not want to do and you are fully entitled to use that two letter word ‘NO’.

This is something people really need to start practising, if something costs you your happiness or your mental health then you might want to really considering saying no and focusing on your own well being instead. What people usually do is they get asked to do something by a friend or a colleague and you feel rude to say no but think to yourself if that is something that you do not want to do or is going to put you under stress because it is adding more workload on top of what you already need to do then it’s not worth it. Sure that person might be a bit disappointed but your own well being and happiness is more important, besides which if that person is a true friend then they will understand.

That is something that people also need to remember, if that person would be worth doing whatever task for then they will understand why you say no, if they hold the fact that you said no against you or it comes between your friendship then that person was never worth doing it for anyway. True friends will understand that it will make you unhappy or it will affect your mental well being and they wouldn’t dream of holding that against you because that’s not what friends do, real friends want you to be happy and do the best you can not get mad at you for turning something down.

Your happiness and mental health comes first! That is more important than anything! Obviously we all like to be helpful and like to lend a hand to people to make their lives easier but if it is going to be detrimental to yourself then it is not worth it! On that note I am going to leave you with this:

“Anything that costs you your peace is too expensive”

Thank you very much for reading this one and hope that it gives some people a bit of food for thought and potentially helps them out. Please leave a like if you enjoyed it and maybe a comment to let me know your thoughts. I post twice a week every week so if you would like to keep up to date with my content feel free to follow me. I shall see you again on Friday. Ciao!

 

 

People Come & Go

This is probably the biggest lesson I have learnt in the past week, a key to being happy in life is understanding that people come and go. Not everyone in your life is going to be there till the end, truth is someone who is currently your best friend may not even be an acquaintance anymore in a couple of years… this is okay.

You will be much happier in life when you realise that this is a natural thing and there is nothing you can do about it, it’s just part of life. Things change, people change, situations change.

Nobody is going to be the same person throughout their entire life, sometimes people change and their friends are no longer the best people for them to be around, for example if you’re an alcoholic and trying to pack in the drinking, you’re not going to want to hang around with your mates who go out every weekend to the pub and get absolutely hammered and pressure you to drink, that’s just setting yourself up to fail.

This topic rings strongly with me at the moment because last week I met up with someone who I’ve been best friends with since I was 6, however since we live far away from each other we’ve only saw each other twice in the past 15 years (context: we used to go school together but she moved away and we kept in contact) and one of these times was last week.

We met up and we didn’t get on at all.. We could not have been more opposite, this resulted in us both leaving it drained, after a few days of not talking we had a chat and that was the end of our friendship, my friend decided that it wasn’t going to work and we both felt like we didn’t know the other person and so that ended our friendship. Just like that our close friendship came crumbling down.

This just goes to show how easily a 15 year friendship can end so easily but that’s okay, yeah it sucks that it’s over but when it happened I realised I could either be upset and make myself feel crappy, or I could just accept that it’s part of life and move on.

So like I said understand that you will not always have the same friends, people come and go and that’s just how it is, once you realise this and accept it it’ll save you a lot of heartache in the long run. Anyway I am going to leave this one as i’m rambling, so I will leave you with this:

“In life; People come and go. So, don’t waste your time holding onto people who have let you go”

Thank you very much for reading this one and I hope that it helps someone and prevents them from being as upset when a relationship or a friendship ends. Leave a like if you enjoyed it, massive thank you to everyone liking my posts! Comment to let me know your thoughts. I hope to see you again on Tuesday. Ciao!

 

Don’t React In Anger

So we are all human, none of us are perfect, one way in which we are not perfect in is controlling our anger. At some point we have all lost our temper and lashed out, possibly said or did something that you didn’t mean and probably left the situation feeling regret. That quick outburst just because you were angry can put massive strain on relationships, possibly even end friendships, could get you in trouble with your boss, there is no limit to the negative effects just a few seconds of lashing out can cause.

Obviously this is something you want to avoid, so how do you do this? Don’t react straight away, when someone says something that angers you, stop yourself, bite your tongue if you have to, stop yourself from saying anything and think about what you are going to say. Remind yourself that you don’t want to say anything that you will later regret, an angry outburst might be what you want to do and might make you feel better in the moment but it will very soon have repercussions and you will probably regret saying whatever you said.

One piece advice you often hear is to count to 10 in your head, this is a very good technique for calming yourself down and not reacting when your anger is at its peak, allow yourself to calm down, let the anger subside before you reply. This will save you from straining relationships and losing friends over stupid things as well as saving many future headaches.

What you have to understand is people reflect back whatever they receive, for example if you ask someone a question politely then you will likely receive a polite answer, however if you are rude to that person then that person is just going to think “f*ck you” and be rude back to you or withhold the information from you.

Lets take a shopping experience as an example, say you are in a shop in a desperate rush as you have work in 20 minutes, you are looking for an item but are unable to find it so you walk up to a shop assistant and ask them where that product is, if you walk up to them full of anger because you are stressing that you are going to be late and talk to the shop assistant like crap then they will very likely give you crappy customer service and will just point you in the general direction of the product or just tell you they have none in stock. However if you walk up to them and politely ask for that product then they will likely walk you over to it and possibly quickly check the back for you if none are on the shelf.

Being polite and well composed at all times and not letting your anger get the better of you will always serve you better than if you let it take hold and you lash out. Hope you enjoyed this one, I will leave you with this:

“A┬ámoment of patience in a moment of anger saves a thousand moments of regret”

Thank you ever so much for reading this one and I hope I helped you to think more carefully about what you say when you are angry and not to let your emotions control you. Leave a like if you enjoyed it and possibly a comment to let me know what you think. Follow my blog if you would like to keep up to date with all the posts I upload. Thank you again and I hope to see you this Friday. Ciao!